Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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