We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
