I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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