we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
