Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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