new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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