scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
