whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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