Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize