I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
