Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
