I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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