you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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