So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
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