At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
