Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Randomize
