Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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