apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
