i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
