summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
