I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
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