I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
