Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
