god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
