It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
a search helicopter?!
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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