i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize