yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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