I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
