How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
