I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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