Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
