was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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