tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
