That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
