Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize