everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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