Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
