one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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