How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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