We're facebook friends in real life
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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