I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
