No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
and she was petting her beer can
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
