she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize