What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Randomize
