The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Randomize
