Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I can feel your judgement through the phone
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
