no, he came in my armpit
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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