..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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