These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
