Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize